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The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.

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Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.

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That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.

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War is not the continuation of politics with different means, it is the greatest mass-crime perpetrated on the community of man.

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The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.

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Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.

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Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can't remember what they are.

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It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood... War is hell.

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When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world.

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Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.